Supporting a Survivor
When someone tells you.
You do not need the perfect words. You need to believe them and stay.
How to respond
Believe them.
Listen without interrogating them.
Do not blame them.
Do not pressure them to report.
Ask what they need.
Respect their decisions.
Help connect them with professional support.
What you can say
“I believe you.”
The first response a survivor hears shapes everything that follows.
“Thank you for telling me.”
Disclosure takes trust. Name that.
“How can I support you?”
Let them define the help instead of assuming.
“You can decide what happens next.”
Returning control matters more than fixing anything.
If you are supporting someone, you are allowed to need support too. Advocates at 800-656-HOPE also talk with friends and family members.
Want to know what happens next for them? Read After Sexual Assault so you can answer questions without pushing.
Last reviewed: September 2026